Seasonality is a term we use in accounting and business using to explain increases or decreases in the profit and loss of a company which are due to seasonal changes, and not symptomatic of problems in the company.
To me, the term can also translate into my walk with Dear God in that sometimes we’re in a period that is seasonal, and it isn’t due to God’s failure or our failure or successes; the season simply dictates the outcomes of our finances, relationships and health and how loudly we can hear Dear God.
This is probably one of the most difficult things I’m wrapping my mind around right now…
If I look back at periods of my life where I beat the ground looking to God why there’s delays in movements and shaking my fist at the sky, but I took into account the seasonal affects, it would have allowed me to have more rest when going through some of the ups and downs. Some the times I thought I must have been a complete failure to not have had more money in my savings account, or that promotion that I was expecting was delayed, or children when my friends were having them, are among some of the most difficult ups and downs that, as far as my life is concerned, can be attributed to seasonality.
For instance, when many of my friends were being mothers, I was building international business; our seasons were different, but not any less important – despite what the World, or even members of the Church, would pressure us or say.
On that same vein, my husband and I were talking about the season we’re in now; season of rest. Today we were sitting on the couch talking over the weekend we had, last night I was upset and tears were flowing because I felt that even though everything is going really well as I finished off the year making triple what I did last year at the same time, and we were relocated and stabilized, but I still felt that I was a failure.
Well, he understood how I could look at it that way. Essentially year ago, we had our own company that was making 7 and 8 figure deals, we were traveling with 12 employees to locations as exotic as UAE, Australia, Germany, New Orleans and Vegas. Last year this time we were piping hot and speaking with investors, stressed about our prognosis but still listening to Dear Lord about what the next steps were. Then, in about three weeks from now, this time last year, Dear God asked us to close our doors and move in a different direction. We reluctantly, painfully, obeyed.
Today my husband reminded me how Paul used to be Saul and he was the leader of the Synagogue, esteemed among men who, when God asked him to, left everything (basically forced by Dear Father blinding him temporarily and sending someone to talk sense into the man) despite what his previous peers would have admired, went, and had a humble tent making business while becaming a minister to what would be the first generation of Christians and one of the most prominent authors of the New Testiment.
It’s hard to imagine, not at all insinuating we are like Paul, but in the same way we were heading an International company, we had name, title, influence, and we were suddenly asked to enter into a new season. To everyone’s logical mind – why would we go from having influence, ownership of our destiny, stability to suddenly a humble earning, enough to keep the debtors at bay, but giving up the rest? For Paul, it’s more obvious, he had influence but he was a murderer. For us, it’s not obvious yet, but from what I can learn about Paul – it went on to glorify God even though to certain men of power, it didn’t make a lick of sense.
Someday I hope to see the sense in our transition, as we are able to make such clear sense of Paul’s. One thing is for certain, we listen and we are grateful to wait in this season of rest.